8/23/2023 0 Comments Selective listening definitionSelective listening means only paying attention to the points someone makes that are important to you, that impact you, or that you agree with. Selective listening is an ineffective listening practice that operates in much the same way. On the other hand, if you catch yourself pseudo-listening, a mindful practice involves admitting to the person speaking to you that you were not being fully attentive and kindly asking them to repeat themselves (while re-engaging your full attention on them).ĭo you have a favorite color? If so, when you look at clothing when shopping do you find yourself drawn to the color that you like most? If so, what you are exhibiting is a preference to stick to something that you already favor. Although we may get away with it in some situations, each time we risk being “found out” there could be negative relational consequences. We should avoid pseudo-listening when possible and should avoid making it a listening habit. Although they may have felt they were trying to be a good friend by showing you they were listening, it can cause more harm than good. Imagine a scenario where you have shared something important with a friend and found out that they had not listened to you at all. Therefore, pseudo-listening is often used as a politeness strategy. Hearing a story repeated, complaints you have heard before or suffering from fatigue or preoccupation can all lead to this. Most often pseudo-listening is a pitfall that can lead to negative consequences, but the reason for engaging in this practice is not typically done out of malice. It includes behaving as if you are listening by providing nonverbal or even verbal feedback (back-channel cues) and showing you are paying attention when you are not. Pseudo-listening is pretending to listen (Adler et al., 2018). If you have ever listened to a professor, friend, or family member tell a story while nodding your head politely while your mind was a million miles away, then you have engaged in pseudo-listening. fMRI study of social anxiety during social ostracism with and without emotional support. Nishiyama Y, Okamoto Y, Kunisato Y, et al. The impact of mindfulness on empathy, active listening, and perceived provisions of emotional support. Active listening: The key of successful communication in hospital managers. Jahromi VK, Tabatabaee SS, Abdar ZE, Rajabi M. A 3-stage model of patient-centered communication for addressing cancer patients' emotional distress. Michigan State University, MSU Extension.ĭean M, Street Jr RL. Balancing openness and interpretation in active listening. This can help keep you from feeling annoyed and unheard. If you're talking with another person and they are clearly uninterested in the conversation, it may be best to end that conversation respectfully.
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